Writer's Block

I don't know what to write.

I could write about the semester being over this week and how I have been anticipating this summer break for weeks - anticipating the sheer amount time I'll have to do things to take care of the house, my family, and myself. 

I could write about the students who didn't pass the class and are now scrambling to do extra work to pass - seriously?  How about doing the homework that was assigned and actually passing a test?  But I feel like I'm always griping about students, so no. 

I could write about the Bay to Breakers coming up this Sunday, which I'll be walking for the 6th time, and how unprepared and old I feel.  Ugh, I don't want to think about it! 

I could write about the fact that I didn't lose any weight in the last year, but at least I maintained, so I should be comforted, right?  Isn't that what people are supposed to say?  "But at least you stayed the same.  It could have been worse!"  Yeah, I feel all sunshiney now, thanks.

Maybe I could write about what I really feel about my nephew being on a mission is a South American country with the goal of converting people to a religion that was started by a con man (I suppose you can guess how I feel about that). 

I could write about my Mother's Day, but then I'd have to admit that it wasn't as good as I wish it had been.  I saw Dark Shadows, and I went alone.  (And that was the good part.) 

What about books?  I could list the start of my summer reading list.  I'll tell you that it starts with Stephen King - is anyone really surprised?

I could write about couponing and how my lack of time hasn't allowed me time to do much shopping lately, but we're not lacking for anything because I have a small stockpile.  Yes, small - I don't need $25,000 worth of stuff!

I could write about the trash TV I like to watch.  Every once in a while it's fun to watch the paternity test results on the Maury Povich show.  A woman had been on there NINE times for the same kid. Ouch.

Or I could write about paying off my student loan.  It will be paid off in the next year - only about 10 years early.  That's a great feeling.  And paying it off will mean that we are debt free - no car payments, no student loans, no credit cards - absolutely no credit of any kind ever again.  Amazing.

I could write about my offspring.  A teenager and a toddler-going-on-teenager.  It's a wonder that the gray hair is limited to only a few strands.  The munchkin is not thrilled with the word "no" lately, so she's been a real treat to deal with.  The teenager actually took out the trash cans last night without being asked.  He even brough them in today without being asked.  Wow!

I could write about Howard Stern on America's Got Talent.  He's a nice change of pace from Piers Morgan, though he hits to buzzer faster than Piers did.

But I guess I won't write about any of those things, at least not tonight.

Resolution Time!

Everyone starts talking about resolutions - it's the NEW YEAR; we must set goals!!  I can't help but think about those things I've been wanting/needing to do.  The beginning of the year does seem like a good time to write them down, create a checklist, if you will.  I may not accomplish them all, but here is what I have so far:

1.  Lose about 35 more pounds by May 20 for the Bay to Breakers and for Sylvia's wedding on May 26 (spaghetti straps - eek!!!).  This one is a must - I want to beat my time at Bay to Breakers and want to have rockin' arms for the wedding!

2.  See more movies at the movie theater - I miss seeing movies!  The summer I saw everything that came out is still one of my favorite summers.....

3.  Read at least one "for fun" book every week.  The book club book is one, now I just need to do 3 more a month.  Right now, I am reading "Nickled and Dimed" by Barbara Ehrenreich.  Well, I started it anyway..... 

4.  Blog more - at least once a week.  My poor blog gets neglected when I get busy, but I want to make it a priority.  Writing has always been something I've enjoyed, and I feel good when I do it.  So I need to get to it!

5.  Get organized and stay that way.  Yeah, I don't know about this one.  I am semi-organized, but I have a hard time keeping the clutter at bay.  I used to be sooo neat at my old job.  My desk was always neat when I left for the day, and everything had a place.  I was super organized at work, but I've never been able to completely carry that over to home.  I think I might have to call a professional organizer for this one.

6.  Pay off the last debt - my student loan.  With my new, old job, we should be able to pay off the balance this year.  I am so excited to be done with debt. 

So there they are - my "resolutions" for 2012.  I'll keep you posted on how I'm doing!

Happy New Year!!   

Open Window

I'm at peace with where my life is at the moment.  I had to make a tough decision, but once I did, everything else seemed to fall into place.  It's a great feeling, but not anything that I can put into words, so I've borrowed some pictures from the internet to show you.  Enjoy!

http://myartlessonplans.com/

http://wallpapers.free-review.net/42__Spring_Blossoms.htm

http://www.taltopia.com/view/177265/



http://www.arthit.ru/abstract/0079/abstract-art-18.html

http://vectorart.org/swirl-flower-vector-graphic/

Mommy

My daughter calls me "Mommy."  I like it; that's who I am to her.  I am her "mommy" - there is only one other person in the world who has called me Mommy (he grew out of it - punk).  It's my title in my home, but don't confuse it with a descriptor of who I am - the term does not define me.

I hate (loathe, destest, despise, abhor, anathematize) the term "mommy" when used by adult women to describe themselves.

I think it stems from the fact that part of the problem with many kids today is their sense of entitlement.  They've been given everything they've ever wanted from the moment they graced their parents' lives.  There is a sense in young people that just because they are alive, they don't have to work for anything.  And it comes back to their "mommies" in the end.

This new breed of mother, the "mommies," are women who are now making their children the focus of their whole world.  Their entire identity is wrapped up in their children, giving all of their time and energy over to the kids.  Giving, giving, giving - all the time.  And the kids learn to take, take, take with no thought of anyone but themselves. 

My mom was a stay at home mom until I was about 7 when she had to rejoin the workforce.  Even still, when she was at home, I knew that I was not the sole focus of her life.  That's not to say that we didn't spend time together, but she had a home to run and other kids to take care of.  I got pawned off on the older siblings at times or was sent outside to play and get out of her hair.  My happiness, while I know that my mom wanted to make sure I was happy, was not the whole of her job.  She taught me to find happiness on my own and to think about things on my own, without her.  Life doesn't work that way.  The best moms teach their kids to be independent.

And that's an issue I have with the "mommies" today.  Their kids are never on their own!  Mommy is always there (helicopter mom), ensuring little darling's happiness at all moments.  Mommy has to be sure that the apple of her eye is perfectly comfortable with everything he or she wants to be fulfilled (no, I didn't say need - I don't dismiss that these women provide for the needs of their children, for the most part).  Little princess always get a toy when out shopping with Mommy.  Little buddy has all the video game systems and every new game that comes out.  Mommy is always there, ensuring happiness, but never allowing Junior to learn that sometimes life brings disappointment, sometimes life makes you wait for what you want.

All this is just to say that the phrase, "I'm a mommy," really drives me up the wall.  Some will think I'm a bad mother, but whatever.  I know I'm doing it right.  My kids will be strong, independent members of society.  They will treat others with respect, and they will never expect to get something they don't deserve.  And that's because I'm only Mommy by title.  My actual job description is educator: I am teaching my kids how to live in the real world!  And to do that, my kids have seen their mom in all her roles, not just one: mom, teacher, friend, sister, daughter, girlfriend, TV junkie, writer, editor, helper (there's more, but I'm tired)....

Now, if I could only get these women to see themselves as more, too.

 

The Sunday Evening Blog

This makes the third Sunday in a row that I've written. Could this be a habit in the making?  Let's hope so.

I've been thinking of something to write this week, and because my life is not as eventful and wildly interesting as I would like, there are limited topics to discuss: bad students, good students, my kids, Farmville.... See, not all that extensive.  Or exciting, for that matter.  But then I remembered the nifty little gadget that I got for Christmas and have just now put to use - my Nook.


I love my Nook.  I have tons of books at my fingertips.  Currently, I am reading "The Help" by Kathryn Stockett for the book club meeting this month.  It's a great story so far.  I'm not that far in, but I have a feeling I am going to greatly enjoy this one.  I long for the days in high school when I could read a 500-page novel in a day because I had the time.  I may just make it in time for the meeting with this one.


This is also my first experience as being part of a book club.  I was invited to join by one of my colleagues at the business school, and my supervisor and another director are also in the group.  The women, who have been together for many years, were very welcoming to a newcomer.

So far this year, we've read "Rebecca" by Daphne du Maurier and "Devil's Bargain" by Jade Lee. When school gets busy, I usually just read Harlequins because they're all the same formula and don't require any deep thinking.  They're a good escape after reading textbooks and student papers all day.  But the book club reading list is taking me out of that zone and getting me back into real reading again.  I didn't realize how much I missed finding new books and reading different things.  Thank you book club!

And I have to thank Howard for getting me a Nook because without it, I would have to add to our already overloaded giant bookshelf!  Did I mention that I love my Nook?

Start.

I want to blog, I start blogging, I stop blogging, I start a new blog.... Here is the newest incarnation of my fascination with blogging... I am always awestruck by people who keep regular blogs, those who actually update them and write silly, fun, witty posts and have people actually read them! Wow! So I am going to give it a shot - I am going to blog!